Back in my early 20s if anyone had suggested that I, an ambitious, freedom loving feminist put my career path on hold to be an Indian style home maker for my husband and family, I would have slayed them. What my younger self didn’t realize at that time was sometimes in life it’s not you who make the choices but circumstances that make the choices for you.
And so with seven years of marriage and two little kids in tow, I had no choice but to stay at home with my kids. More so, since my husband’s job requires a lot of travel, we worked on this old-fashioned arrangement to provide a constant in our kids’ lives. So call it a circumstance or choice, I’m now a housewife!
Yes, I used to have a corporate job. I’m also a writer. But with complete lack of substantial income, the fact remains – I’m a housewife! Whether I call myself housewife with a hobby or a housewife who writes, I cannot deny myself the title ‘Housewife’.
But no matter how hard I try to fine-tune myself for the time-honored title, there are certain things about traditional style Indian housewife that just don’t sit well with me. Here are 6 reasons why I suck at being traditional style Indian housewife.
- I don’t aspire to housekeeping excellence:
Agreed, it’s my responsibility to keep the surroundings clean and presentable but having a sparkling, perfectly tidy house is not a priority to me. Devoting full hours to shifting furniture, arranging crockery, or perfectly folding never-ending piles of clean washed clothes is not my cup of coffee.
- I don’t like going to kitty parties:
If you are in India and a housewife, you know, kitty party tops the list for recreation. Also, you need a group to socialize and have fun. But besides exchanging domestic inanities and playing a few card games, the kitty party members in my locality do not do much. And before one get-together is over they are already planning the next and soon you are sucked into regular dates and forced friendships.
This is not conducive to my personality. I like to socialize sporadically and remain anonymous. So thank you.
- I don’t enjoy mom-talk:
Sure, I can talk at length about fixing fussy eating habits or regularizing poop schedules but that does not mean I enjoy it. I would rather love to banter about the business of books than business of food and poop.
- I don’t like to cook and discuss recipes:
I do know how to prepare and serve delicious food but I like to do it for myself. When it comes to serving guests or cooking something special for family, I am perfectly happy to serve them pizza or ready-made meals. And please don’t discuss your recipes with me.
- I don’t like to gossip:
Well, to be honest, it would be wrong to say that I don’t like gossip. Because, I do – when I am really wasted for time, I do enjoy reading all the juicy gossip on my Facebook account feed about half a million people in the world, all of whom I don’t even know just because it’s fun to know they exist. Also, these stories help me dream and wonder about different people and places in the world.
But if you ask me whether I would like to know why the husband of so and so woman who lives in our neighborhood left her for another woman, then nope, I am not interested. It’s none of my business. I have other things to do.
Anyways, regardless of how I suck at my honorary title, the truth is I am here. And I will make it through – somewhere between order and chaos with random glimmers of success and occasional stints of failing.